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iamlachesisIt's really hard to believe it's been five years.
I've been thinking.
I know quite a few of my friends, as well as hearing/reading about this before - well, it's hard to articulate, but I wonder in some sense if some of us knew this was coming.
Not in the actual sense - in the metaphysical one.
I know reading back on my own journal entries, as well as reading other friends' journals at the time, how it seemed like there was just something very wrong... I mean, what else would have drawn me back here so strongly? Two/three days before?
What else would have made me feel so unstable?
For those people that dont wish to or choose not to believe in this stuff, that's fine, but I and my family have had too many 'coincidences' to chalk it up as such. This also came at a time when I was once again trying to reconnect with my spiritual self. The coven in NC wasn't it. Midian wasn't it.
I came back by myself. Telling no one why.
Once when I was 10 or 11, I was home by myself (again) at night, sitting at the kitchen table, afraid to leave the kitchen. There was a large candle on the center of the table. I was focusing for a long time on the candle, until suddenly I woke up, my head resting on the table, and all the lights in the house were out. They came back on about five minutes later.
Since that time, I'd learned what scrying was, about different types of energy and electricity (one of the reasons I've always lived near water, it seemed), and how to manipulate them. Of sorts. Since I'm still not focused enough.
Maybe that's what part of this was, to regain my focus.
To remind me what I'm doing here.
I still dont know.
I've been thinking.
I know quite a few of my friends, as well as hearing/reading about this before - well, it's hard to articulate, but I wonder in some sense if some of us knew this was coming.
Not in the actual sense - in the metaphysical one.
I know reading back on my own journal entries, as well as reading other friends' journals at the time, how it seemed like there was just something very wrong... I mean, what else would have drawn me back here so strongly? Two/three days before?
What else would have made me feel so unstable?
For those people that dont wish to or choose not to believe in this stuff, that's fine, but I and my family have had too many 'coincidences' to chalk it up as such. This also came at a time when I was once again trying to reconnect with my spiritual self. The coven in NC wasn't it. Midian wasn't it.
I came back by myself. Telling no one why.
Once when I was 10 or 11, I was home by myself (again) at night, sitting at the kitchen table, afraid to leave the kitchen. There was a large candle on the center of the table. I was focusing for a long time on the candle, until suddenly I woke up, my head resting on the table, and all the lights in the house were out. They came back on about five minutes later.
Since that time, I'd learned what scrying was, about different types of energy and electricity (one of the reasons I've always lived near water, it seemed), and how to manipulate them. Of sorts. Since I'm still not focused enough.
Maybe that's what part of this was, to regain my focus.
To remind me what I'm doing here.
I still dont know.
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Candle
Date: 2006-11-07 06:00 am (UTC)It is still strange occurrence in world of this day, since the world is full of light bulbs much brighter than candle flame. Maybe you could have brighter & clearer dream by the fireside (shamanistic voyage & vision maybe also used to describe the experience)
Scientific explanation could be amount of alpha-waves rising up to level what you would normally consider a dream state, because of relaxing effect of the candle.
@>,'---
Did you used to write A-Team fiction?
Date: 2006-11-14 06:25 pm (UTC)Re: Did you used to write A-Team fiction?
Date: 2006-11-14 06:42 pm (UTC)